Went to WW last night and stepped on the scale to find that those same two pounds I've been playing with since the first of August (literally) were back. It's time to say "buh-bye" to them for good! (Can I get an amen?) I've got to get off my laurels and get serious about this. I've gotten lazy, but enough is enough. I AM WORTH THIS! No one ever said this journey would be easy or that there wouldn't be bumps along the way. And I have nobody or anything to blame but myself. I have to take back the control and pull up my big girl panties and get this done. I've come too far to stay at this spot, or, heaven forbid, go back! Perish the thought!!!
When I started this journey a year ago, I knew that I was an emotional eater. Any and every emotion imaginable caused me to focus on food. Food was my security blanket -- actually, it still is. I've just learned to channel it differently. However, I have since come to realize that I am more of a stress eater. I let things bother me sometimes that shouldn't, and I let things that should bother me build up to the point of physical symptoms. I also realize that I've had stress all along (who doesn't, right?), but by starting this blog back in January I was able to either vent frustrations (diet, life, etc.) or just write things that had nothing to do with the stress I was experiencing at that time, taking the focus off of it and allowing my mind to clear.
I have always had a problem with self confidence. And I've been pretty good at masking it with humor most of my life. However, that humor then turned into sarcasm, anger, resentment, etc. It was a nasty, nasty path I was on. But I chose to get off that path of self-destruction and focus on me and why I'm worthy. Please understand that stupid little voice of doubt still tries to impair me and, sadly enough, sometimes I listen. So that's where I ask for YOU to help me once again. You have all been so encouraging and helpful with your thoughts, ideas, etc.
And I want to encourage each of you as well. Most of you have listened to my whining and drama all my life! *LOL* I've found that one of my strengths is listening to others. I may not always have advice or know what to say, but I have good ears, strong shoulders, and arms to hug.
God bless you! (And thanks once again for listening to me.) Now go out there today, one foot in front of the other (baby steps, of course) and made someone smile today. :)
