THUR 11/8

Happy Thursday, people! Is it just me or has this been a roller coaster week for you too? I don't know about you, but I'm plum ecstatic that tomorrow is Friday. I'm planning for a regular uneventful weekend...no more drama, no mud slinging, no nothing...just the usual housework, laundry, cooking, planting my butt on the couch and taking a nap if I want to type of weekend.

Went to WW last night and stepped on the scale to find that those same two pounds I've been playing with since the first of August (literally) were back. It's time to say "buh-bye" to them for good! (Can I get an amen?) I've got to get off my laurels and get serious about this. I've gotten lazy, but enough is enough. I AM WORTH THIS! No one ever said this journey would be easy or that there wouldn't be bumps along the way. And I have nobody or anything to blame but myself. I have to take back the control and pull up my big girl panties and get this done. I've come too far to stay at this spot, or, heaven forbid, go back! Perish the thought!!!

When I started this journey a year ago, I knew that I was an emotional eater. Any and every emotion imaginable caused me to focus on food. Food was my security blanket -- actually, it still is. I've just learned to channel it differently. However, I have since come to realize that I am more of a stress eater. I let things bother me sometimes that shouldn't, and I let things that should bother me build up to the point of physical symptoms. I also realize that I've had stress all along (who doesn't, right?), but by starting this blog back in January I was able to either vent frustrations (diet, life, etc.) or just write things that had nothing to do with the stress I was experiencing at that time, taking the focus off of it and allowing my mind to clear.

I have always had a problem with self confidence. And I've been pretty good at masking it with humor most of my life. However, that humor then turned into sarcasm, anger, resentment, etc. It was a nasty, nasty path I was on. But I chose to get off that path of self-destruction and focus on me and why I'm worthy. Please understand that stupid little voice of doubt still tries to impair me and, sadly enough, sometimes I listen. So that's where I ask for YOU to help me once again. You have all been so encouraging and helpful with your thoughts, ideas, etc.

And I want to encourage each of you as well. Most of you have listened to my whining and drama all my life! *LOL* I've found that one of my strengths is listening to others. I may not always have advice or know what to say, but I have good ears, strong shoulders, and arms to hug.

God bless you! (And thanks once again for listening to me.) Now go out there today, one foot in front of the other (baby steps, of course) and made someone smile today. :)

It's Time...

It's time to get back on track.
It's time to get myself re-motivated.
It's time to do this!

I've fallen into the lazy mode again. Who am I kidding? I've been in lazy mode for the past few months. I want my mindset to be what it was back in the springtime. I want to feel empowered and motivated again. I want, I want, I want. I want a lot of things, but now it's time to put it all into action.

I sometimes think I'm sabotaging myself. Like there's this huge mental roadblock. What am I afraid of? Am I making this more difficult than it really is? Why did I lose my motivation and focus? 

WEIGH IN - August 16, 2012

Down a pound this week. For a total of - wait for it - wait... - FIFTY. POINT. FOUR. Yep, mighty happy, mighty, mighty happy.

Last week I started being more diligent about tracking. Not 100% yet, but better than I was. Plus, I decided to re-start the whole Couch-to-5K program. It's been pretty fun (and quite motivating) to compare the distances & pace times to last time.

That's all for now :)

IT'S TIME...

It's time to quit talkin' the talk, and start walkin' the walk!!! I've gotten a wee bit lazy this summer. Yes, I can blame it on the heat of Hades for not exercising regularly (or at all, truth be told) and have allowed that excuse to filter down in my eating habits, thought process, etc. Not good -- and no longer acceptable. I MUST GET BACK ON TRACK!

I must track my foods.
I must make time to exercise.
I must quit making excuses.
I must remember how far I've come (not how far I still have to go).
I must, I must, I must!

Help!?!?!?!

Weight Gain Due to Heat?

Below is a response to the question about weight gain (without any dietary changes) experienced during heat/humidity. I found this very interesting. I feel it answers my question of the scale fluctuation over the past few weeks. I have found myself waking up the past few mornings with very puffy eyelids, stuffy nose (swelling in sinus cavity), and just generally feeling like a big ol' fat tick!

That’s not your imagination. A significant portion of the human body is water. When the weather is hot, body weight can go up by several pounds due to increased body water.  In warm weather, fluid-conserving hormones kick in which allow the kidney to retain more fluid…and reduce the amount of salt in sweat, leading to even more water retention. Water retention accounts for many day-to-day fluctuations on the scale. We tell our clients year-round, and especially in the summer months, that a gain is not actually a gain unless the scale goes up 2.5 pounds or more, as daily variances in water weight can account for that much (possibly more).
Have you ever noticed how quickly swelling can happen in warm weather? You might be inside in air conditioning and your rings are loose, and then step outside into the heat and your rings are suddenly stuck on your finger. It’s a natural reaction to the change in climate. Heat edema is a swelling of the extremities associated with exposure to high temperatures (commonly during heat waves or when someone accustomed to more temperate climates travels to a warmer climate).
As a reminder, it’s best to weigh yourself once a week at the same time each week to avoid getting discouraged by any day-to-day water retention variances. And, it’s always good to remember that the scale isn’t your only measuring tool. How your clothes fit, your energy levels, how you’re sleeping and how you’re feeling overall are great indicators of the positive changes that are happening within. We’re glad to hear the program is going well for you…now put the scale away for a while, step into the A/C and relax with a cold glass of ice water.

WEIGH IN - 7/18

Yeah, yeah, yeah...I know it's been awhile since updating my weekly weigh-ins. Life seems to have just been such a whirlwind lately.

Let's see, there was no meeting on 7/4 due to the holiday so we were to pick another meeting that week. I weighed in on Saturday 7/7 and was down 0.6. I was feeling pretty okay with that...at least it was down. I carried on as usual and looking forward to the next weigh in, back to my regular meeting time on Wednesdays. So last Wednesday I go to the meeting, slip off my shoes, step up on the scale --- now let me say that I wasn't expecting any big loss or anything; after all it had only been basically four days since the last weigh in. I was expecting to stay the same pretty much -- only to find that I had GAINED two-and-a-half pounds!!! I was astonished, to say the least. How does one gain that in four days? It blew me away and that nasty old "Negative Nelly" started whispering doubt and defeat into my mind. I don't care much for Nelly...and I don't care much for when I allow her negativity to invade my very being.

I went back over my tracker to see what was different or what I needed to change. I honestly saw nothing out of the ordinary except that I'd had more sodium (Crystal Light and/or Diet Coke) than usual. So, I cut those out this week and last night's weigh in brought me right back to where I was two weeks ago. That 2.5 is now gone...again.

Maybe it's the heat. Maybe it's stress. Maybe it's _________. I'm just not feeling as positive and goal oriented as I was. That must change! It simply must. I've come too far to be satisfied with staying where I am. (I'm happy with this current weight, but it's not where I desire to stay.)

Onward ho. Forging ahead. Kicking out "Negative Nelly". Determined to stay the course. Time for some positive reminders and reinforcement.

My Cup Runneth Over...literally

Someone please explain to me how one can lose almost 50 pounds and NOT go down in cup size!?

**NOTE:  if you're one of those gals who:  (a) complains about small boobs, and/or (b) complains about "that's where I lose weight first", then just shut your yammers! I don't wanna hear your sob story. Until you've had big boobs (and by big, I mean non-pregnant D cup or larger) you honestly don't have a clue what you're talking about.  *big smile*

I have always, always, always had big boobs. Even when I weighed 100 pounds soaking wet, I was a C cup. And before you ask, yes, I have checked into reduction surgery. Yeah, they kinda want money for that...lots and lots of it. (And the only way my insurance would cover such a procedure would be for reconstruction purposes due to a cancer-related mastectomy. Not something I'd like to experience.) No, they no longer accept a doctor's note about headaches & spine/shoulder malformations, etc.

I went shopping over my lunch hour to try and find a new bra. All of my current bras are lose, with exception of the cup. So I'm glad about having lost inches there. However, bra shopping is not something I enjoy. It is a chore...kind of like ironing or dusting. (And I highly dislike those and don't do them nearly often enough.) Now, finding a bra for the truly full-busted gal is extremely difficult. I can usually find what I think I'd like online, but why on earth would anyone spend that amount of mega-bucks without trying it on? I mean, seriously!

Just for kicks-n-giggles (neither of which actually happened) I tried on one of those balconette styles. The tag said it was for full-busted, so I thought "what the heck". Ummmm...yeah, that did not even come close to working. How anyone with any size breasts could wear one of those is beyond me. I mean I would always be tugging at it, trying to pull it up to cover the top, even though it's designed to be somewhat sexy I guess. THERE IS NOTHING SEXY ABOUT THESE THINGS! (On a side note, I've never understood a guys fascination with boobs...but that's another story.) I then tried on one that promised "amazing lift". Ummmm...for boobs this size the bra would have to be industrial strength and come with wheelbarrows! And how much lift do I really want? I swear my boobs go from the bottom of my neck to where my waist used to be! If they're to be lifted then I would be able to see. :)

Therefore, I did not find a much-needed bra. *sigh* I think Bette Midler got it right in the movie Beaches ("Otto Titsling") --

WEIGH IN - June 27

I know it's been a couple of weeks, but that's just how it goes sometimes. We have had a rough couple of weeks with the loss of Don's dad; therefore, I didn't weigh in last week as I was traveling to be with family. Everyone was so wonderful to our family during this time and it always warms my heart when others give selflessly - especially now. However, like my mother-in-law said, I don't care to see another ham again anytime soon! *lol*

I was much surprised last night at WW weigh-in to find my weight DOWN like it was. I'd lost 1.8 (one point eight) since last weigh-in, so all in all I'm pleased. This puts me right at the goal I'd set for myself and was hoping to reach last week (around my birthday). I am officially at the HALFWAY point!

I really need to get back to regular tracking (which I'm doing better at this week) and exercise (which is going not-so-well.) I just have no desire. I mean, let's be blunt honest here -- I hate to sweat. I dislike it about as much as I dislike putting my hands in dirt/mud. And it's so stinkin' hot right now that I'm sweating without actually having to exert any energy whatsoever! The heat/humidity is so oppressive.

I actually set out workout clothes last night and set my alarm to get up at 5:30 to go for a walk. I had no intention of jogging yet, but thought a walk would at least get me moving and outdoors -- and to beat the heat. Yeah, not so much. I got up at that time, looked to see what the temp was and turned off my alarm and crawled back into bed where I snoozed quite nicely until 6:20. (Disclaimer:  I also had the beginnings of a nice headache when I got up. And after that freaky monocular migraine yesterday -- followed by a nasty headache the rest of the day -- I didn't want to risk going out for a walk alone.)

So, I rejoice in having reached my HALFWAY GOAL and pray for cooler weather so that I can get outside and enjoy it a little bit. (Because I hate working out in our basement...booooring!)

C25K GRAD :)

On Friday, June 8, 2012 I participated in my second 5K. It was the Moberly YMCA Ready, Set, Glow Run/Walk...and it was a lot of fun! I used this as my final Couch-to-5K training. I only had to walk twice (both times were uphill and only for about 30-45 seconds each.) It was so nice to be around friends & family, and I'm especially thankful for my BFF for making the trip with me. I'm already looking forward to the next 5K...wherever it may be.

And a special "thank you" for the after-race yummies goes to Sandy!

FUNK

FUNK [fuhngk] noun -- a dejected mood

Yep, that pretty much sums it up. And the worst part? I don't have a clue why, but I've felt it coming on all week. I hate it when that happens. Ever just want to lock yourself in a windowless room and cry for no particular reason? I think maybe this funk is a side effect of built up stress and emotions. Maybe?

I hate most that I allowed it to rear its ugly head last night and push me down. I'm stronger than that! Long story short:  after much "debate" about where to have dinner last night we ended up at Applebee's. Now, I know they advertise approved Weight Watchers menu items, but for those of you who don't know these menu items consist of three options. One is 8 Points, one is 11 and one is 12. I've had the 8 point option before and it was okay - not my favorite, but okay. Last night I was not in the mood for any of these three options. So what did I do? Caved. Big time. Sure there are other healthier options than what I ended up getting (and eating the whole blessed thing!), but my mindset/focus was already gutter deep. What did I have, you ask? The Pick-Three Combo -- boneless wings, cheeseburger sliders, and spinach-artichoke dip w/chips. Yep, sin on a platter. And I at the whole thing. No carry-out box for me. And let me tell you, after the last bite I was so miserable. (I'm sure I was before the last bite, but I just ignored it and kept on chewing.) That miserableness was not just physical, it was emotional too. The physical misery lasted all through the night -- I didn't sleep well, my stomach churned, etc. In fact, even this morning I wished I had the courage to make myself throw up...that's how much my stomach hurt. The emotional misery has brought on the feeling of funk, and not in a good way. (Obviously.)

I've gotta get out of this mood and get my head screwed on straight again so I can conquer this mindset. I have to stay focused and determined.

P.S. Thanks for listening to me whine.

WEIGH IN - 6/6

Down point six. Not too shabby considering I had not made very good choices all week. (Confession:  Prior to weigh-in last night I was actually preparing myself for the possibility of a gain.) So I am pleased that it was a loss, but sorta beating myself up for not doing what I knew was best and for allowing myself to fall into that "well, I had a good week so I can cheat" mentality. Therefore, the next post about being in a funk...

The Comparison

The difference from January to June is a 30 lbs. weight loss.

The difference here is 46 lbs. (so far)

(Top size - from 2X to L)

(Pant size - from 20/22 to 14)

WEIGH IN - 5/30

Minus two point two :)  *insert happy dance here*  This makes for a total loss of 46 pounds so far...almost half way there! (Thirty of this has been just since January.)

I'm well on track to my goals, and working on "mini-goals" from week to week. (Things such as: a bike ride with Chloe, or a new bright colored tank for my next 5K, looking for a size smaller slacks for work, etc.)

By the way, I just signed up today for my next 5K. I'll be participating in the Railroad Days Extreme Fun 5K Run/Walk in Moberly on Friday, June 8th. (I chose those one because it's at 9:00 PM!!! Shouldn't be too terribly hot then, right? *lol*)

Also, since I messed up and deleted the comparison photos from May, I will be taking new photos since tomorrow is June 1st. It will be fun to compare them with the original photo from January when my "I'm gonna do this" journey began. I'll probably need to change outfits -- those blue shorts barely stay on anymore, and that white tank is huge! So be looking for new pics this weekend.

WEIGH IN 5/23

Down again this week! (yeah)  Minus point eight --- just under one pound, but I'll take it!

I've not been as active this last week or so, so I need to get back in the exercise groove. Besides it being a huge plus for weight loss, it's also a good stress reliever and mind-clearer :) I know we've all heard the benefits of exercise before, about how it relieves stress, helps mood, etc. Well, it's true. So if you're not active, get off your bum and do something...I'm not saying go train for a marathon or anything (unless, of course, you're into that), but get out and do it. The fresh air is good for ya! :)

Now, the next thing is my goals. I've been hesitant to publish these. Yes, I do have them written down for myself and I look at them from time to time. However, I hate to "put them out there" and then not meet them...but that's why they are goals, right? I mean, they are there for me to reach for. If I don't reach them, then I can adjust them. As long as I keep striving. Am I right? Or am I disillusioned? Seriously, give me your input. I figure it can't be much worse than putting actual before & after photos on here. *lol* I mean I write this blog and place photos, etc. not just for myself, but for each of you who are so good to encourage, inspire and help keep me accountable. So here goes...

**Disclaimer:  If you don't want to know the gory details or feel it would hinder

your judgment of me in any way, then please read no further!**

I am currently 4.2 pounds away from being at my HALFWAY point. (Yes, I have that much to lose! Remember, I started this whole WW thing at a hefty 240 lbs. My ultimate goal weight is 144 -- which is 40% of my starting weight, meaning a loss of 96 lbs. Yes, you read that correctly...kinda mind-blowing isn't it?)

Weight Watchers starts you out with two immediate goals -- 5% and then 10% of your starting weight. I took that idea and ran with it. I set a chart for myself using the 5% increments taking me to my ultimate goal weight. I then decided to put a "deadline" of sorts with each of those. (These are spaced out and very do-able. The intention is to give me a specific "you gotta go for it" timeline.)

20% = 192 (for a total loss of 48 lbs) --- I'd like to reach this by my birthday (June 18, 2012)

25% = 180 (for a total loss of 60 lbs) --- I'd like to reach this by Labor Day (September 3, 2012)

30% = 168 (for a total loss of 72 lbs) --- I'd like to reach this by Thanksgiving (November 22, 2012)

35% = 156 (for a total loss of 84 lbs) --- I'd like to reach this by our wedding anniversary (February 9, 2013)

40% = 144 (for a total loss of 96 lbs) --- I'd like to reach this by Mother's Day (May 12, 2013) == GOAL

So there you have it. I think a loss of 12 lbs over a three month period is very attainable...based on my success thus far. I understand and accept that there will be "good" and "not so good" weeks. However, I am determined to not have a "bad" week. (A bad week would mean that I gained or stayed the same.)

So please dust off those pompons and continue to cheer me on! I appreciate you so much!

WEIGH IN 5/16

Another week and another loss :) I'm down another 1.2 pounds this week, for a grand total thus far of 43. I am close to "half way" to goal, but I am extremely determined :)

I DID IT!

I completed the Mother's Day 5K in Moberly in just under 45 minutes. (Not fantastic, I know, but I'm quite proud of myself.) I tried to start out having no expectations, but let's just be real about this...those of you who really, really know me know that that's impossible. I always have expectations! *lol* My original goal was to just do it; speed was not important. Goal accomplished. However, just before the start of the race yesterday I told myself two things:  1) aim to walk as little as possible, and knowing that I'd more than likely have to walk more than I'd like, 2) aim to finish in under 45 minutes if at all possible. Well, I was right -- I did have to walk more than I wanted to, but also did finish in under 45 minutes...barely. BUT I DID IT!!! It was quite thrilling and I feel inspired to keep up with this whole running thing, too. (As you know, I'm not actually quite finished with my "Couch to 5K" training, but I am determined to see it through...and then keep on running.)

Thanks to my sister-in-law for getting some great pictures from yesterday, even though we never actually saw one another until after the race. I'm also quite grateful that she didn't get any shots of my during my walking modes! *LOL* 

 

 

That's me in the white shirt and aqua skort puffin' my way down the first hill...at the beginning of the race - yes, puffing already. (I had debated on whether or not to just go for it, or to plug in my "Couch to 5K" app and follow it...should've done the latter. Yet, at the same time, I found that I can push myself when needed and learned when to back off a little bit.)

Regardless, it felt good to have accomplished this goal :) Now on to the next goal...  :)

BELATED

I've been so busy I haven't had a chance to post WEIGH IN 5/9 yet! I was down another 1.6 pounds this week -- yeehaw! Getting further and further away from those 200s.

All my training is about to be put into action. I've been working on this Couch-to-5K thing since February -- with a small set-back when I hurt my back. Tomorrow, Sunday, May 13 is Mother's Day and I will be participating in the 5K in Moberly. I have no expectations as far as time goes -- my goal is to just do it. I'm not doing this for anyone but me and my mom :)

WEIGH IN DAY - Wed 5/2

I did it!!!! I made it to ONE-derland!!! Down two pounds this week and finally below 200. What an amazing feeling. This makes my total loss so far 40.2 pounds.

My "reward" was to get a running skort - something I'd been wanting for quite awhile. Don had bought one for me about a month ago, but I put it away with the tags still on it, determined NOT to wear it until I'd finally reached my mini-goal. (If you remember, my goal was to be under 200 by Memorial Day. Yeah, kinda whipped that *ha*) I was secretly hoping to be there in time to wear this new skort at the Mother's Day 5K in Moberly...looks like I'll be able to :)

My next mini-goal? Well, my 20% goal is 192 - which I'd like to reach by my birthday (right at 6 weeks away from today.) CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!

WEIGH-IN DAY (Wed 4/25)

Minus point eight. Yep, .8 -- or 8/10 of a pound. Not really what I was expecting or hoping for, but a minus is a minus!!! I'm glad, but I'm getting tired and frustrated with these "itty-bitty" results the past few weeks. I mean, I'm tracking, I'm exercising, I'm staying pretty focused, etc. So the pounds need to just fall off!!! (Yeah, I wish it worked that way, but it doesn't.)

HOWEVER...

I am wearing smaller sizes now! (YEAH!!!) In fact, a pair of black dress capris that I bought on a recent shopping adventure (6 weeks ago today to be exact) are now too big. I dug around in the bags of clothes I've had stored in the basement and found a couple of pair of khaki pants and tried them on so I'd at least have something besides the one pair of brown slacks to wear to work. They fit! Size 14. :)

And I even found some old t-shirts that had been stored -- some I've never even worn! -- and put one on the other night to go for a walk with Chloe. Yeah, it fit! Size L. :)

So, even though I may whine and complain about those "itty-bitty" weight losses, they ARE adding up. To date I've lost 38.2 pounds. Gone for good! Never to return! I've gone from wearing a size 20/22 pants and 2X/3X tops this time last year, to a 14/16 pant and L/XL top this year. And hopefully this time next year I will be at or near my goal weight...and I can't even imagine what size clothing I'll be reporting to you then!

I'm still gearing up and training for the Mother's Day 5K in Moberly. I hope I'm able to actually jog the whole thing, but if I do have to stop and walk that's okay -- I promise to not walk for long!

I have all these mini-goals within reach. I'm determined to grab 'em! (Then make new ones, of course.)

Down, Baby, Down

Minus ONE more pound this week! Total so far is 37.2. Thirty-seven-point-two!!! I'd say that "Operation: Determination" is off to a good start :)

Operation: Determination

What a beautiful day! The birds were chirping this morning, the sun is shining, it's a cool, crisp spring morning. I'm even looking forward to going for another walk tonight - and hope to add in a little light jogging back into the program. I hope to be back to where I left off in my Couch-2-5K training by the weekend.

Yesterday I kept up with my WW tracking and already off to a good start on it today, too. :)  In the midst of my slump the past few weeks, I let that slide, too. It's too easy for me still to slip back into old, not-good habits...and I've come much too far to let that happen! So, it's back to those good habits and motivation techniques that have helped me so far. In fact, I saw this motivational picture this morning and it speaks volumes:

I am DETERMINED to keep the faith. I am DETERMINED to stay focused and on track. I am DETERMINED to succeed.

Baby steps. One foot in front of the other. And if/when I do falter, then to pick myself right back up, dust off, and take one more step forward.

(And just so you know, I do expect to see a loss on the scale tomorrow night. I don't care how much - just as long as it goes down.)

Note to Self (continued)

(for whatever reason -- probably due to my Monday brain -- it wouldn't let me insert text anywhere after inserting the picture)

I've been a bit of a funk the last few weeks. Feeling a lot of doubt, etc. Can I do this? Will I succeed? It seems that I'd gotten a bit too comfy with myself. In the joy of having lost enough to start seeing and feeling the results, I began to get lazy about tracking, keeping my focus, etc. While keeping my "mini-goals" in sight, I need to remember the bigger picture at the same time. Yes, I'm feeling and looking better, but I don't want to settle there -- the comfort zone. I need to push past that point into what I know will be even better for me. I have to do this! I have to remember I'm doing this for ME...and I deserve it! Keep my eyes on the prize :)

Note to Self

WEIGH IN - Wed 4/11

Well, there's good & bad. Good = I lost what I'd gained last week. Bad = I didn't lose any "extra". But the good outweighs the bad. I'm happy to have lost that 1/2 pound and not have stayed the same or gained...so I'll take it.

But no more of this scale see-saw stuff!!! No more, I say.

And I'm also happy to report that after having horrible back pain earlier this week, I'm finally able to move (although not quickly) without extreme pain. The chiropractic treatments have helped and I'll go back on Friday for another adjustment. I'm hoping, too, to be able to get back to my 5k training. In fact, I may try to go for a walk tonight. No jogging, but just a nice walk to get back into moving and some much needed fresh air. That is, of course, as long as I feel like I can do so without over-doing anything. (Besides that, I'm now experiencing some cold/allergy symptoms -- ear ache, sore throat, cough...yuck. But I'm taking drugs for that and hoping they kick in quickly.)

WEIGH IN - Wed 4/4

Okay, body, so that's how you wanna play, huh? UP 1/2 lb from last week. Boo! :(  Not quite what I'd hoped for or planned, but that's what the scale showed. A bit discouraged? Sure. BUT...I know that means I need to look back over the week and see what was different. (I know for sure that today I've not had enough water.) Plus, I figure after having such a big (unexpected) loss last week that my body said, "Woah, Nelly! Can't have two big weeks back to back like that. Gotta keep you in line here!" *lol* And that 1/2 lb could be muscle, too, right? I am working out more. I just want to be under that 200 mark soooooo bad!!! I know I'll get there, and that I'm actually ahead of schedule on that goal, so I just need to calm down and keep on keepin' on.

Dare to Compare

Here are pictures as promised -- comparing January 1st to April 1st. Progress!!!

WEIGH IN - Wed 3/28

Are you ready for this!? Are you!? Really!?

THREE. POINT. SIX.

I know! I can't believe it either!

I am so close to being under 200 that I can hardly stand it! It's mind-blowing to think I've lost a little over 36 pounds -- and a little over 20 of that has been just since January! This weekend will be April 1st and I will post new pictures to compare to the old ones. (Yes, I realize that I didn't get any posted for March 1st as planned -- I took them but accidentally deleted them from the camera before I could get them downloaded to the computer. Sometimes me and technology have this love-hate relationship.)

I am so pumped and excited and energized and determined and...  Well, you get the idea.

I have to attribute some of the "extra" weight loss (meaning more than 1 lb a week) to exercising more. I am self-training for the Mother's Day 5K in Moberly. (I highly recommend downloading the Couch-2-5K app if you want a realistic, do-able approach to running. I am in no way one of those fast runners. In fact, there are walkers who probably can lap me! *ha* But I'm okay with that. I'm not doing this for speed or anything like that, but it is a good workout.) I also dug out an old Biggest Loser workout video and started it. I have found it's working a lot of muscles that I forgot were even there...even though there are some things I cannot do, such as get down on my knees. (Actually, it's just one knee...can't put any direct pressure/weight on it, such as kneeling. Other than that it doesn't bother me at all. It's numb the rest of the time. Kinda weird.)

Anyway, my workout "plan" is to do the 5K training three times a week and the BL video two times a week, allowing my body to rest (more like fully recover! *ha*) on Wednesdays and either Saturday/Sunday. I think it's a good start for me and something I can work with.

Again, I thank each of you for your support! It's inspiring and incredibly helpful. Love ya'll :)

P.S.  I forgot to give a shout out to having friends (Kara & Colby) join WW last night! I'm so happy they've started this journey and that maybe, just maybe, I can help and encourage them along the way.

WEIGH IN DAY 3/21/12

DOWN ANOTHER POUND! I am just so excited! And thankful! (I give You the glory, Lord.) And looking forward to all the mini-goals I'm reaching...all leading up to the finish line:  the goal weight range for my body. I'm feeling so much better, both physically & mentally. The encouragement and support of so many friends and family has been a huge part of my success. I honestly couldn't do this without your loving support. You keep me accountable. You help me to stay positive (especially when I'm feeling down). You inspire me.

Thank you. Thank you very much.

(Elvis has left the building.)

I sat down earlier this week and set myself up with some mini-goals in 5% increments. I am very close to losing 15% of my starting weight...very close. I'd love to reach that by next WW mtg, but two weeks from now is probably more realistic. I wrote all of them down and have posted it in my weekly WW weigh-in card so that I can visibly see it and mark it off (with the date) with a red pen each time I reach one. I also have other mini-goals in mind. For instance, when I reach "One-derland" (aka: being out of the 200s), then I've asked Don to buy me a running skort (or something similar). I cannot wait to reach that goal -- because I've got a really cute one picked out! *lol* If you remember from an earlier post when I reached my 10% goal, I said that I wanted to be at 199 (or less) on or before the end of May...I think I may reach than sooner! (What a blessing that would be!)

I also decided after the amazingness of last week (buying smaller size pants, etc.), that I was NOT going to hold on to all of the size 20/22 pants and 2X tops. Because I am not going back there. Not gonna do it. A good friend could use the tops, so I gave them to her. The bottoms I put on a FB swap-shop page and have already sold most of them. That money is going into a special envelope just for me -- it's the "Cindy needs and wants another good sports bra" fund. :) Let me tell you, bras aren't cheap -- especially for us large-chested gals!

Which  brings up another subject. Last week at my WW mtg the gals were "complaining" about losing weight there. I rolled my eyes! "Are you kidding me!?" I said. "I only WISH that's where I'd lose weight!" Now, while I may not have always been fat, I have always had big boobs. I'm not making this up when I say that in my teens I weighed anywhere between 100-115 pounds --- and had a C cup (sometimes D, depending on the style). Ask any of my family! True story. So when anyone complains about not having boobs or losing weight there first, I just wanna smack 'em! *lol* But on the other hand, I would much rather have these big ol' things than a set of hips...but that's just me. And if scientists ever figure out a way to suck boob fat out and inject it into others who want bigger boobs, then I'll be the first in line to share the wealth! Lord knows I have enough to give 10 ladies the desired C cup and still have a DD cup for myself. *lol*

Okay, enough of my rambling. Love ya'll!!!

Can I brag for a minute?

Pardon me while I gloat...

Yesterday was a phenomenal day. One like I've not experienced in a looooooooong time. Chloe and I took the day to just hang out and do some girl stuff. I was on a quest to find a pair of "replacement pants" -- the original pair had gotten a little loose, plus a problematic zipper (which was currently being held up by a purple rubber band looped through the zipper pull and hooked around the button...a little redneck engineering). We entered Dress Barn Woman where, lo and behold, there they were! After a couple of months of looking all over mid-Missouri for a pair, here they were just waiting for me to purchase them. You'd have thought I'd struck gold, I was so excited. However, knowing that I needed a smaller size (*yeah*), I sauntered into the dressing room only to come out with very mixed emotions. The pants fit great in the waist, but they were still baggy everywhere else. The saleswoman then came up to me and said, "Honey, as much as it discourages me to say this, you need to go to the regular Dress Barn and get the same size. They just won't be cut as full and hang on you like these do." WHAT!?!?!? Did she just give me permission to go shopping in the regular-size store!? YES!!! I about started crying. Literally -- you can ask Chloe.

I went ahead and purchased a gorgeous blouse there that Chloe picked out -- yes, it was even a smaller size, but still cut fuller in the chest. Lord knows I'll always have this big ol' boobs!

We then make our way to the regular-size store (I can't help be do the happy dance just hearing/seeing that) and pull their last remaining pair of slacks in that size. I then go into the dressing room, put on the blouse I'd just both, take the pants off the hanger, then hold my breath and close my eyes while pulling them on. Buttoned? Check. Zipped? Check. Slowly release breath and open eyes, then reach for the door and walk out. Chloe loudly exclaims, "Momma, you look hot!" I admit it, tears crept outta my eyeballs.

(And besides that, I also got a great deal on a new pair of running shoes. They were on the sale rack for $45, then at the register I got another discount -- paid only $34 including tax! Shazam!!!)

I am on Cloud 9!!! This was just the boost in confidence that I needed. It's one thing to see the numbers going down on the scale and to feel better, but to actually step out of the "comfort" of those old clothes and slip into the comfort of new, smaller sizes -- the whole physical process -- has been just what I needed.

WEIGH-IN ~ Wed 3/14

MINUS. TWO. POINT. EIGHT. Yeah, you heard me right...down 2.8. I 'bout fainted. I knew (felt) that I'd lost, but I was not expecting that much. So excited! In fact, I'm going to reward myself with a new pair (or two) of pants. (I have the day off work tomorrow to spend the day with Chloe -- she's on spring break -- so we're headed to the Lake.)

2.8 :)

The Day Before

Well, here I am sitting here and wondering if tomorrow night's weigh-in will show a loss -- or gain, or plateau (don't care for either of those two) -- and will I reach that 30 pound mark. Trying not to worry or fret about it, because that's when I tend to snack. Plus, I just enjoyed some really yummy pizza rolls. (1 can of reduced fat crescent rolls, 3 slices of turkey pepperoni per crescent roll, 1/2 low-fat string cheese per crescent roll; bake at 400 deg for 12 min. -- 2 rolls=serving) And watching The Biggest Loser. So, knock on wood, say a prayer, kiss the Blarney Stone...whatever "luck" is needed. I hope when we chat tomorrow night that I can share good news! :)

Waiting, Trusting, Hoping

This was the title of my devotion today...and it could not have come at a better time. It comes at a time when my heart is heavy with concern, burdens, questions, doubt, anxiety, fear. (All things from the devil himself.) I'm just really struggling with some things right now in my life that have seemingly piled up all at once -- even though that's not totally true. I know that I need to rely upon Him - my Comforter and Friend. I know that I just need to take all of these to Him, drop them off at His feet and trust Him to provide answers where needed, peace/ease of worry, etc.

But it's so hard to do! I know I'm not the only one who feels that way, but I really, really struggle with each one of those words. And to put them all together in a strand (as the devotion suggests) is almost mind-blowing for me. I know it's the right thing and what God wants for me, but I fight putting it into action.

Much like my weight loss mantra -- baby steps, one foot in front of the other, right?